The Tower. Death. The Ten of Swords. #myfirstpost (re-blog)

Hello everyone! My fellow blogger kiwinana – Elsie Hagley – of “Ramblings of a Writer” blog, recently re-posted her very first blog post. kiwinana inspired me to go back and look at my own first blog post. And here it is! (below)

Back then (August 2013) I had almost no followers and I was a newbie to blogging. I was feeling low about my own writing, and at the same time, my eldest child had just been diagnosed with blood cancer, a disease that was to kill him ten months later.  I think I was in a silent panic, not even acknowledged to myself.  They told us he had an “87% chance” of surviving under their treatment – so we expected him to live.  It was a fussy, complicated treatment, with multiple drugs on multiple days, spanning several months.  But he would live, we thought.  We just needed to get through this horrible time.

As I sometimes say, you never think they’ll be in the “13%” (dying).

I’ll include a photo of him here, taken at OHSU Portland, the first week of treatment.  My daughter knitted the purple PICC line cover on his left arm.  (He looks healthy, doesn’t he? Ah, well.)

Les Kiger 2013
Leslie, August 2013, photo by Theresa Barker.

Looking back on all the blogging and writing I’ve done and read in others’ blogs over the past 3-1/2 years, I’m realizing how much I’ve learned in that time.  Thank you all!

What was your first blog post?

Theresa Barker - Lab Notes

Tarot Cards

The plane is noisy, crowded.  The flight is full.  They’ve done the beverage service and they’ll be coming down the aisle soon with the food cart.  In front of you a businessman has flipped open his laptop, is typing away furiously, probably on his email.  Across the aisle a kid is watching a movie on the digiplayer, headphones plugged in, slouching.

You were hoping for a seat with no one next to you, you only want to relax and forget what has happened in the past 48 hours, but instead you are seated next to a modern-day gypsy.  She pulled down the tray table and laid out tarot cards as soon as the plane leveled off.  As much as you tried not to look, you couldn’t help but notice the exotic illustrations on the cards.

She turns to you. 

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11 thoughts on “The Tower. Death. The Ten of Swords. #myfirstpost (re-blog)

    1. Thank you for telling me that, Dippy-Dotty Girl! At that moment the blood cancer was still relatively small. Just before he died it was all through the body – lymph nodes, bone marrow, etc. – and that’s what killed him. But in this photo he still looks very happy.

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      1. Oh! My apologies for coming out and saying that. It is a sad thing and I hate for it to make other people sad… – but I really appreciate your kind thoughts. 🙂


  1. Ah, Theresa, I know the pain will always be there. I think we only get used to it. As I said before, I can imagine this and I pray so hard every night that my kids are always safe. I know it’s not a sure way but it makes me feel better, I guess. I hope you remember him as he was here. I think it helps a little to cherish him this way than how he was much later, when the cancer was at its worst, before it took him away from you. It doesn’t take away the pain, it doesn’t make it better, but I hope it helps… Warmest hugs my dear friend.

    Liked by 1 person

    1. Anne, you are so wise! I do cherish the time we had together – that last year during his treatment we had so many good conversations – primarily because he was no longer working full-time and he had the time to talk. He also expressed how much he treasured our relationship during those conversations. I have that to remember him! :: HUGS ::

      Liked by 1 person

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